Welcome, Rachel

I am at the Odin Teatret. Lilicherie met me, driving the theatre's ancient yellow BMW trundle-van. The flight was an explosion of insights & writing. I was in that fazey state where you can ask any question and get an answer.

I cried when we pulled onto the crunchy gravel and parked. Cried again when I stepped into the familiar hush of the theatre, and again at the bibliotek -- my room to clean, which holds Eugenio's writings, the library, computers, and dining tables. More insights unfolded when I saw the new wing for the Center for Theatre Laboratory Research:

When you are doing your work profoundly, you change even the physical space around you. Which in turn changes you. Physical space is another aspect of bootstrapping.´

There is a tradition here, since there is no communal food, for someone to prepare a meal to greet a special guest. It is not people who meet you; it is simply the plain beautiful food. I have helped prepare such meals before. It did not at all prepare me for the impact of one awaiting me.

On the long table which seats 18 was a lone place setting. Two vases, one of white lilies, one of orange mums & heather. Two covered white china bowls -- one with steaming hot buttery rice, couscous, & green beans; the other with fresh-sliced cucumbers, fat small tomatoes, and fresh basil leaves in a vinaigrette. On a breadboard, a loaf of french bread, one green apple & a kiwi fruit, a generous unopened container of cream cheese, a round flat tin of unopened fresh pepper, and a bread knife. A glass-bellied pitcher of water. A drinking glass and a worn green tea cup. The dishes set out on a plain thick blue cloth.

"Welcome, Rachel!" said the note. "Kisses from Emanuella."

The bibliotek was empty. No one was there except the steaming food, and the gift of forethought.

Karin and Magnus came. They and Lilicherie ate with me. What performances have you made, where are you in your work, we asked each other. I showed them the giant Himalaya photos that sparked Nanda Devi.

Then it was time to go to Rina & Ulrik's daughter's confirmation -- a traditional all-day celebration in Denmark. Bookshelves lined three rooms in a jumble of Italian, Spanish, English, and Danish.

My body knew the way here. It was a long commute, but a familiar one.

And now -- sleep.

everything's the same
but more so -- what was missing
still gone; what's here, grown